summer 2014 149So I live in what many rational people may consider one of the craziest phases of life. I’m completely honored to be the mom of littles. I used to fear the unpredictable, the messy, the chaos that life can be.  I now have two kiddos who have taught me to do my best to embrace all that this life is even when it’s yucky. When I’m talking chaos I’m describing an utterly disheveled home, messy kids, and more love than I ever could have imagined. Without these people I would enjoy perfectly simple dinners with my husband. We’d talk about our day or upcoming vacations.  I’d poke and prod to learn more about this amazing friend. Instead our dinners are boarder-line disturbing.

I’m fairly confident that without Mr. D in our home I never would have heard myself say “pull up your pants and eat your dinner!” Had it not been for the curiosity of the littles I never would have walked into our nursery to discover an eruption of toys, cloth diapers and random {and utterly embarrassing} mommy mementos. Such a scene is surely something many parents have walked in on. For your sake hopefully not all parents decide to keep gross things in the top drawer of a closet organizer. Any guesses? Here’s a clue… I may or may not have heard myself say “tell me you didn’t just eat your umbilical cord stump!?!” Sadly those words did come from my mouth. Thankfully no umbilical cord stump was consumed that glorious day. Somehow in my foggy postpartum state I couldn’t convince myself to throw away a  piece of my connection to these babies.  In retrospect I’m sure I subconsciously find the beauty of their umbilical cord and the life it nurtured extra special after loosing big brother Seth. I swear the umbilical stumps are the oddest of my mommy mementos!

Somehow the chaos of these hurried days has become so beautiful to me.  Sadly I don’t typically embrace or realize the beauty during the moment.  Most days my reflections happen long after the last “Good night, I love you!”  I pray that these rushed moments will ease as my work schedule changes and our family adjusts.  More on this soon.

summer 2014 150

I wonder about other mommies and their moments of reflection.  The other night while on a date night with Brent we visited Target.  I know you’re impressed with our date night destination.  I suppose I’ll really wooo you when I mention we also visited Lowes and Wegmans… pure perfection.  I watched so many mommies with their kiddos rushing through the stores the same way I often do.  She smiled at me as I admired her kids.  She seemed exhausted.  I sincerely hope she sat down after her long day and smiled thinking about the embarrassing question her son asked at Target.  I wonder if she knows that in her brief embarrassment I was there in her shoes smiling. I wish her and you the best as you embrace your crazy hectic super messy love.  How does this unexpected love enter your life?


190 thoughts on “Chaotic Love

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